Cathartic journaling of an adoptive mom.
Latest Posts
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Adopția ca o rană în proces de vindecare
Subiectul adopției este atât de comun în casa noastră. Și când apare în compunerile fetelor pentru școală, și le întreb despre ce au vrut să spună ici colo, răspunsurile vin la pachet cu seninătate și umor și debit verbal. La început, după ce s-au așezat lucrurile acasă, am adus eu vorba de adopție. Nu a…
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Paying attention / Active listening
“She doesn’t seem to be interested in what I have to say.” Humans are self-centered and insecure. Some grow out of it. Most don’t. Jackie was telling me how some adults don’t pay attention. I am sure that she has been spoilt for choice and has had many adults hang on every word and engage…
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Family
We’ve taken the peace for granted, i think. We often do, in our society. But we have course-corrected with grace, before too late. We enjoyed some new and old stories, and the silence in between. We asked questions and listened intently. If we expect more from others, and offer little of ourselves, we may find…
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Home economics
The Game: 10 lei a week (it’s not about the monetary value). Pay taxes, tithe, utilities, rent, see about some savings and how much money will be left over for spending. Usually barely enough for a croissant. On the chores chart: reading daily, homework, cleaning their room, their bathroom, set the table, clear the table,…
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Disciplina postului
După întâlnirea momco din iris am hotărât sa încercăm o zi de post. Singura si de capul meu fac destule. Dar am vrut ca aceasta experiența sa fie împărtășită cu familia. Conrad a fost de acord fără nici o lămurire suplimentara. Pe ivy am întrebat-o si a răspuns prompt “ok, când?” Când i-am zis si…
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lineage
I don’t wait for the girls to bring up adoption. I initiate. Intuitively I know when they are worked up about a curiosity and they also talk freely among themselves and don’t make a big deal out of it. The adoptive moms’ bookclub had a lot of questions about my approach. They asked if it’s…
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white after darkness
When you have a busy social calendar, taking a few weeks off from seeing people feels heavenly. On the other hand, if you long for connection and crave socializing, staying home throughout some winter weeks feels exhausting and lonely. If it was just my husband and I, without any self imposed pressure to make the…
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First birthday of the year
In the year of AI and other algorithms taking over social media, I don’t want to post any memento of my daughter’s birthday, but I want to comemorate it in writing. I seem to have misplaced my purple leather diary, so I will reflect here on a few thoughts about celebrating birthdays. I am not…
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Fast turning tide
We are on top of the world. We have our health. We have each other. The course of life is steady. The kids are safe under our roof. The storm of adolescence hasn’t hit us yet. Their dependence is sweet and natural still. While they dare to brave the new beginnings, the grownup works, they…
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Before Christmas with our adoption connections
A few friends shared with me how hard this year had been. And my mind slowed down and I felt deeply their unspoken ache of loss, pain, hardship, fear, frustration, hopelessness… all passing, yet real and valid. As I pray for them I release the burdens I don’t need to carry. Meanwhile I got to…
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Friendship with adult siblings
As a mom I have intervened with logic between the occasional small sisterly quarrels. For the most part they have been pretty easy in showing kindness and grace and respect to each other. We may have modeled it, we may have encouraged it with words, we mau have prayed for it. But it’s not a…
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Surprised
On one hand, I took back some of my authority and decided it’s not yet time to let j be fully responsible for her stretches. She did them once when Conrad told her to get to it, and she kept her corset on. I had a conversation about what would have happened if I hadn’t…
