Category: Parenting
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Words & confidence
Can you fabricate self-confidence? And if you could, would you do it? Talking about the past, as we sometimes do, I stop and tell Jackie: “Wow, what an interesting life you have!” To which she replies, matching my enthusiasm: “I know, right?” Our kids are not victims. They have agency. The way we relate to…
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Letter from Jackie
…It’s better than the most loving eulogy. And I am still around to enjoy it, and let it fill me with hope and delight. I absolutely love Jackie’s mind and heart and teachable posture. She is stubborn but clearly within her rights. Not an inch overbearing. She is reserved with most other people. Observant…
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Moștenire
Scrisoare către fiicele mele (2021) My legacy – to see you! Truly see you. Different. In your splendor. Beautiful. As God created you to be. Să te văd, Jaclyn. Să te văd, Evelyn. Sa te ascult cu o curiozitate proaspăta, iar tu la rândul tai sa vezi, sa simți, sa Asculți la fel. Sa te…
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Teen prayer & budding romance
A decade ago she would cling onto me to stay a little longer. After the bedtime stories, we would pray and then she would ask questions. Sometimes the questions were triggered by the prayer. But mostly we would unpack the day. And we would talk. There were many times I longed to escape. To go…
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Entrepreneurial mindset
Kids may surprise us many times over if we are open to the possibilities. I don’t presume to know what they will do in life, even as I notice inclinations, interests, aptitudes. It is delightful to notice and image the possibilities. My left-handed junior, the visual learner, the technical and the architect type, she struggled…
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Low stakes
I’m impressed with j’s ability to navigate difficult conversations. She gets herself in sticky situations but just as graciously she comes out the other side stronger and wiser and clearer. As I occasionally make suggestions, after we chat for a long time, I tell her she is free to make her own decision. The stakes…
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Addictive butterflies
To stay clear headed when the first butterflies of romantic interest show up, and when you allow them to nest, it is harder and harder to sho them away. Because though they make a mess of things and it is not the right time for them to nest in your space, you like how they…
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Tag! You’re it!
I noticed how j interacts with the boy she likes. Similar to how she relates to Conrad. She is sarcastic, and bossy and uninterested. I wonder if it’s a subconscious thing. For the last 3 years we have had many girly talks, and I am afraid I have inspired them to be feminists through and…
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Transfers and anxiety
A familiar sense of agitation stirs in my stomach. It usually means I am alert and ready to complete a big task. But if this feeling lingers it erodes my stomach and my peace of mind. I am determined to observe my feelings and let them be. Take deep breath and pray about the outcomes…
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Ne ținem de cuvânt
Lecția din săptămâna altfel. Livrată cu un ton apăsat. Din păcate. “Sincer, eu nu prea am chef să merg mâine in excursie cu clasa” E vineri și se încheie săptămâna altfel. Apoi începe vacanța de Paști. A fost târg azi și zilele au fost pline de distracție și gustări delicioase. Ieșirea de mâine e scumpă…
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Why am I so invested?
I do care about my daughter. Her heart. Her feelings.I encourage her to be true to herselfAnd kind to others I listen and I get excited about this new chapterAnd I see her with new eyes I realize I feel ready to let her goTo explore her heartBut I feel the tug to remain closeTo…
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Glean
Glean (April 1st) I’m an intelectual hoarderExperiences that are difficultare valuablePain is inconsequentialJoy is a treat My daughter is going through a first romantic interestwith the boy next doorHe is also learning, growing, experimentingShy but determined And she is introspectiveBut she doesn’t fit the moldWill he have the patience, the courage to take her on?…