Category: teenage stuff
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Hospitable to teenage guests
How hard can it be? But also: how impactful? Go the extra mile. The extra 10 miles in Cluj traffic towards Floresti. I was not planning to be out for so long. I jumped in the car to go get their luggage so they can go to the mall, but there was a mixup of…
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The purpose of breaks
The thrill of acceleration, the speed and the movement. That is the visible and enjoyable purpose of a car. But the breaks are a necessary & good as well. To be in working order. Responsive. The emotional connection is real. Sustained. I wonder if they’ll regret having found such a great first love. These two…
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Letter from Jackie
…It’s better than the most loving eulogy. And I am still around to enjoy it, and let it fill me with hope and delight. I absolutely love Jackie’s mind and heart and teachable posture. She is stubborn but clearly within her rights. Not an inch overbearing. She is reserved with most other people. Observant…
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Teen prayer & budding romance
A decade ago she would cling onto me to stay a little longer. After the bedtime stories, we would pray and then she would ask questions. Sometimes the questions were triggered by the prayer. But mostly we would unpack the day. And we would talk. There were many times I longed to escape. To go…
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Philotic link
This may have helped my daughter overcome incredible emotional and spiritual, social and intelectual hurdles. I lent her my strength without guardrails, without holding back. I actually let power pass through me – it was not my own power given to her. I have felt powerless at times, trying to help her and her hardening…
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Bored or engaged
Letting your kid burn through the stages of first romance is fascinating and gut-wrenching. But I remind myself that this is part of the learning process and her path is different than mine, and just as necessary for her. When young kids like each other they still have the freedom to express themselves, to discover…
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Low stakes
I’m impressed with j’s ability to navigate difficult conversations. She gets herself in sticky situations but just as graciously she comes out the other side stronger and wiser and clearer. As I occasionally make suggestions, after we chat for a long time, I tell her she is free to make her own decision. The stakes…
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Tag! You’re it!
I noticed how j interacts with the boy she likes. Similar to how she relates to Conrad. She is sarcastic, and bossy and uninterested. I wonder if it’s a subconscious thing. For the last 3 years we have had many girly talks, and I am afraid I have inspired them to be feminists through and…
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Why am I so invested?
I do care about my daughter. Her heart. Her feelings.I encourage her to be true to herselfAnd kind to others I listen and I get excited about this new chapterAnd I see her with new eyes I realize I feel ready to let her goTo explore her heartBut I feel the tug to remain closeTo…
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Glean
Glean (April 1st) I’m an intelectual hoarderExperiences that are difficultare valuablePain is inconsequentialJoy is a treat My daughter is going through a first romantic interestwith the boy next doorHe is also learning, growing, experimentingShy but determined And she is introspectiveBut she doesn’t fit the moldWill he have the patience, the courage to take her on?…