Category: Transition
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Why am I so invested?
I do care about my daughter. Her heart. Her feelings.I encourage her to be true to herselfAnd kind to others I listen and I get excited about this new chapterAnd I see her with new eyes I realize I feel ready to let her goTo explore her heartBut I feel the tug to remain closeTo…
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Glean
Glean (April 1st) I’m an intelectual hoarderExperiences that are difficultare valuablePain is inconsequentialJoy is a treat My daughter is going through a first romantic interestwith the boy next doorHe is also learning, growing, experimentingShy but determined And she is introspectiveBut she doesn’t fit the moldWill he have the patience, the courage to take her on?…
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Ne întoarcem mereu la conectare
Ii dau drumul liber și cu toată inima, cu încurajare si binecuvântare. Fiica mea cea mare care cred eu că mă simte, ca o privesc cu încântare și cu admirație. Devine. Ridica fruntea sus, își înfruntă cu eleganță si seninătate si demonii si fricile. Râde de ei și pășește dincolo. A fost un timp când…
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Trying to understand
It’s a trap. A trap of the mind. I’ve been in this labyrinth for some time now, more than I wished to be, and I realize I haven’t figured out fully or clearly why I feel a certain way. Until I let go of wanting to grasp the knowledge. The understanding. To have it all…
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Romance
Both girls giggle about boys. So innocent. Different boys come to the door ti invite them out to play. They gag when they see kissing in movies, but the interest in boys is in a stage of its own in their development. They try to play it cool but then they ask me stuff. And…
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18 years of marriage and a visit to the courthouse
We were the last ones on the roll, and we waited outside for all the drama to happen inside. And we chatted – I got to catch up with Adriana, who came there just in case we needed a witness. But we didn’t. She waited an hour with us. In front of us there were…
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Be yourself
We try to do what’s right but not from within, not from our deep and slow earned wisdom but by being bombarded with new ideas and gentle parenting misunderstood. Oh, you can feel from a mile away a parent who feels in control of their own lives and emotions. Who glide with confidence. Who ooze…
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Spiral
I catch myself obsessing over efficiencyCarrying in my mind plans and ideasI do it because it pays offMost often In my exhausted stateI only rev my engineBut make no progress Occasionally I recognize the frettingAs anxious thoughtsLike a bad dreamWhen I am lucid enoughTo recognize that this is not reality I have never had a…
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Silent
I have danced an exhausting routine of wordsWisdom impartedCorrection and gentle nudgingWe have prayed and I have preachedI always had an answer and an explanationReading between the lines to what the question actually wasAnd kept one step aheadAnticipating needs knowing intuitively what they needAs I knew what they already knew themselves. Until one Sunday disagreement…
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Un Ianuarie tumultos
Am crezut ca începe așa bine. Si chiar a fost fain in prima săptămâna. Am mers într-o călătorie de lucru in Serbia si fetele au venit cu noi. Cu toții am avut o buna dispoziție. Peste așteptări. Dar cum a început școală a început si lupta. O lupta invizibilă de putere. Sau stresul copiilor exprimat…
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Therapeutic retrospection
The girls wanted to watch old videos of themselves. I indulged a trip to the past that lasted an hour. We nearly peed our pants laughing. We watched videos from their first days with us and the few years later. Them playing, us together and mostly regular life at the apartment. Those first years seemed…
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Responding wisely
We can’t control what people do. We can only control how we respond. It’s not what you think. In my quest to cut things off my endless list, my projects list, my to list, as I succeed pulling away from some things, many flood to take their place. Monday was busy. Busy at the pool.…