Cathartic journaling of an adoptive mom.
Latest Posts
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We move forward with hope
I knew my view is skewed, but I couldn’t quite straighten it. In the midst of tension and hardship, we can’t pull ourselves by the bootstraps. We need help. I worried about a lot of things. That my daughter will suffer unnecessarily, that there will be irreparable damage, of lost faith, lost hope, lost trust. …
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Emerging
My Father,I read Your words and they soothe me.I wake up early and I draw near to You.I go to sleep late, And my head rests on Your chest. During my waking hours,I take Your hand. I hold it tight. And follow You, with small steps. I am weary. And I am afraid. Furry and disappointment Discouragement and distress. How can…
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How do you feel?
Nourished or undernourished? Alive or barely surviving? A while ago, the emergency situation stoped being an issue of health or danger of infection. For our country of Romania, for our Cluj county. We are also such home bodies, and we enjoy our social distancing, that we don’t mingle much with others anyway. And for months…
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From endless delay to overnight change
I am really nervous. After months of not knowing what’s going to happen with our adoption process, things are sped up all of a sudden. The country is in an alert state after the pandemic lock down. But our CPS has received guidance regarding the last evaluation before they submit the papers to court. So…
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Healing
I am a rule follower. I am obedient and I see a strong correlation between integrity and respecting the law. On the other hand, the kid in us wants to know: Are the rules clear? Do they make sense? Are they clearly communicated? We are not built to blindly follow. We are built to discern…
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In her grief and longing, she worships.
Then Hannah prayed and said: “My heart rejoices in the Lord; in the Lord my horn is lifted high.My mouth boasts over my enemies, for I delight in your deliverance. “There is no one holy like the Lord; there is no one besides you; there is no Rock like our God. “Do not keep talking so proudly or let your mouth speak such arrogance,for the Lord is a God who knows, and by…
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What’s next?
Tomorrow we were supposed to go bring our daughter home. Even if just for the day. But Romania is entering a lawless weekend. A legal void. Nothing is illegal. But also nothing is clearly defined or permitted. No guidelines. No leadership in place. We are beyond surprise or despair. It’s silly. It’s absurd. What are…
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You’re on your own
Such a familiar feeling. In first grade I realized I’m on my own. The big world is unwelcoming, unreasonable, harsh …but I must face it bravely, with only God on my side. Yet. I’ve taken risks often. I’ve gone out on a limb and chose to trust again. I reach out. I share. Because I…
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Disobedience
Two more days of quarantine. Two more days until we can be reunited with our youngest daughter. Two more days until we begin a new chapter, transitioning from an “emergency state” to an “alert state”, whatever that means, since our ministers haven’t published clear guidelines for most institutions. We are busier than ever, and frankly…
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The apple of my eye
Have you noticed that there are no pictures of Apple Store employees on social media? When I got hired by Apple, we were instructed to steer clear from mixing our job with social media. Too easily, things can get out of hand. We were also instructed to never talk to the media and defer any…
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Hope ahead
Despite all this flexible time, do you feel spread thin? We nearly found a rhythm. Some even made the very best of this sheltering in place. Check out this perspective https://polylogos.eu/blessing-in-disguise/ I spend more than an hour (sometimes three) every day coordinating Jackie’s online school activity. Printing materials, checking her work, scanning, uploading it online,…
