Cathartic journaling of an adoptive mom.
Latest Posts
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About our beginning
I picked up another book to read. Ann voskamp’s last book. She starts with her beginning. And she is honest, and veiled and poetic, but brutally honest. And it inspires me. It’s marriage week and this reading and reflection is serendipitous. We also started naive, faithful, hopeful. Innocence is priceless. What we don’t know (a…
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On loan for a while
In a strange political context, where children belonged to the state, and the state took over the care and education (kids still benefit from free education and health insurance till they become adults no matter their familiar circumstances) from early stages. To gain double the workforce and educate the children according to its values, my…
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Naming that small fox
This weekend I got to read and be encouraged by a blog post and it made me reflect further on my own life. A wise woman builds her house, does not destroy it with her own hands. A seed of doubt was planted many seasons ago in my heart. In darkness and humidity, it sprouted…
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Goodbyes
A month and a half of family time. Sweet and real, challenging and emotional, hard and deeply beautiful. We are saying our last goodbyes. The girls have never wavered in their joy and delight of being here. Not even once. It gave me permission to feel all my emotions, and at times I wished I…
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Reflection on Brian’s Thursday question
Have you ever experienced a sudden insight or experience of God’s transformative grace when you were in a dark place?If so, what aspects of God’s character did you experience? Traveling far away to honor our parentsTo spend quality time of joy and celebrationAnd not come together when it feels too late for fun or connection…
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Practiced skills
I can bring myself to solve complicated math problems, from whatever state of mind. Even if I just woke up, or I am hungry or concerned or sleepy. I have had the practice of focusing my attention and doing what needs to be done. But I can’t write on demand. I studied science not creative…
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Invisible
As a kid I was invisible to most adults. Except for the few adults that mattered. So I felt seen and safe. Growing up rather tall Seemed contrary to my nature Height makes you more easily seen Low expectations is my favorite starting point No disappointment No pressure Then life happened. A lot of good life. And…
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Conversation
Nobody ever accused a good listener of being a boring. When I worked at Apple, my job was not to show off how awesome I was, but to make our customers feel heard, seen, have their problems resolved, make them feel welcome and to want to come back again and again. Approach with a personalized…
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stovetop
The boy I liked, visited me at home. He was from California. Cool, handsome, collected. For some crazy reason, he was smitten with me. And I allowed myself to like what I like, to reach instead of settling. To be vulnerable and admit I like him rather than be pursued for my qualities. I met…
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Awakening love
Last night, over pizza, we had a fun engaging conversation. My favorite thing about the girls is that they can carry a discussion in creative ways, wherever it may lead. It is always enriching for me, even though I know them so well, their mind is a wonderland of knowledge and personality. Conrad wants to…
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Experience with leadership
I found myself taking charge of certain projects in Jackie’s class. The age old engine: “if not me then who?” Still runs like clockwork. To my delight, people followed. Nobody challenged or complained. Though I was ready for disagreements. Last summer I also took charge and didn’t list heart when so many different opinions were…
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Traveling to Austin
The flights I booked had short layovers. We buy what’s available. And it seemed reasonable. With all the delays issues this year, I prayed we can make it smoothly to Texas. And we made all our connections. But our luggage didn’t. Here we are, having washed out traveling clothes to have underwear to wear on…

















