Category: Adoption
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Funk transition
I’m in a creative funk. Being social for me takes some creativity, some lightness of mind and heart. I would much rather put my head down and plow a field, work hard. Quietly. I am a storm of tidying up in my house and sometimes I enlist the help if others, as my drive is…
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The practice of humility
I know the theory. Too well. But my stubborn heart has a hard time embracing humility. I know I’m mostly right (in my eyes) and I won’t budge. Except today. It’s Friday. I have a lot on my plate. I registered jackie for music school in the morning. We moved the drier from the apartment…
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ART
Chiseling is messy.The beauty of the sculptureis vaguely in the artist’s headWho ought to trust their own CreatorFor how a sculpture will turn out. Painting is messy.Stains and splashesCloudy murky waterFingerprints aroundthe apron of life. The final paintingHas a life of its ownThe shapes and shadowsThe light and the voice in itIt speaks, it sings.It…
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Idealizing the past
I visited ivy’s foster mom this week. I promised to stay in touch and I’m a woman of my word. This year has been busy with the new house, with medical appointments and with school, online and in person. I don’t know when and how much time flew by. Ivy even forgot to ask to…
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Peninnah
On Empathy Night I shared part of my story of forgiveness. I frankly couldn’t think of any story of reconciliation in my life, well-defined enough to make sense. But as we heard about what forgiveness is, a journey, a decision, it is not for the other person but for our own freedom. Forgiving is not…
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Grumbling in the desert
Nothing like a dose of humility served with ingratitude by your daughter in front of all your friends. As we give her the stage (because she like to talk or be the center of attention, but she doesn’t have all the filters in place, because she is still a kid, she is still 7, going…
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Traveling through layers of depression
I have traveled Through post adoption depression Gently and kindly kept safe By poetry and psalms. High highs and low lows Furry and numbness I have traveled through seasonal depression The never ending cold The wet and dreary weather Safely embraced and soothed by the listening ears I have traveled through pandemic depression Not alone …
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Time stands still
After a delicious lunch (pasta penner with ham, broccoli and white sauce) we had ice cream on the patio. It was peaceful. It was warm. And we acknowledged the blessing and the joy of the moment. It has been a long time since I felt this way. And my heart burst with gratitude. In the…
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an imitation game
At this stage kids are pretty transparent about emulating the people they love. A year ago she wanted to wear pants like me. Or shoes like me. Today she was dead set on getting a haircut like me. We are aware that we influence our kids. Even subconsciously. I know courage is conscious. Hopefulness. Hard…
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The Woman – interview
Violeta Altmann is an atypical mother, if we look at her in a superficial way and especially through the prism of generations raised in a conservative and closed Romania. Towards the end of college she traveled to the States with Work and Travel, in California and eventually ended up working for one of the most…
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Self-assurance
I started following this adoption account on instagram @theadoptionconnection and soon after, someone reached out to me with a personal note… Which was so unusually friendly and connecting. Today I decided to listen to this podcast and this adoptee who was adopted in the late 40s, in the era of adoption secrecy because nobody discussed…
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Rant in blocked care
Am I the only one who cares? When the floor is covered with a day’s clothes, mixed with toys, and books… and these are just the big items. Sprinkled between there are lego men and kinder egg toys. Every single day. I sort through the clean and dirty socks, I sort toys, I make beds,…