Author: Violeta
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Through her eyes
I went to check in on Jackie and cover her, as she tosses and turns. She had been sleeping for over two hours. Conrad and I always enjoy each other’s company after her bedtime, and shamelessly protect our evenings together without her verbose company. As I tuck her in, she sits up in bed and…
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Aspects of adoption
“Without the theological aspect, the emphasis on adoption too easily is seen as mere charity. Without the missional aspect, the doctrine of adoption is too easily seen as mere metaphor.” Russell Moore Adoption is spiritual war. When we lift our eyes from our selfish selves, and we move out of our immediate needs, we learn…
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Acknowledge, Align and Assure
A decade ago I was hired by Apple and I went to a week of training as part of my onboarding process. Everything I learned there was common sense, but in this particular professional context, it had application and structure. We did role-play, we practiced how to give and receive Feedback, and I learned about…
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Tomorrow is Evelyn’s birthday
Who is Evelyn? Your sister. She turns three. Can we go see her on her birthday? We can’t. I’m so sorry. I really-really want to see my sister tomorrow! I don’t understand why we can’t go see her. [Sobbing]. We sat like that for a while, she was crying by my side, head leaning on…
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Drawn or drifting away
As I get older I realize cynicism is more prevalent. Be that as it may, it’s been ingrained in me to speak with honesty and always assume positive intent. This alone has spared me a ton of grief. I had nothing to lose by taking initiative in kindness even when occasionally it was returned with…
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I don’t tiptoe
When it comes to adoption and trauma, or difficult conversations, or potential pain… I don’t tiptoe. I don’t hold my breath. Because it would be exhausting and a disservice. Instead I own my full seat, and I keep my mouth shut while opening my eyes wide. I allow myself to feel. To understand. To remain…
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Christmas came and went
I’ve been sick. My mind has been hazy. And in such a context, I have a hard time trusting my words. They can go either way: crisp insights or messy emotional ramble. Before Christmas Eve I reached out to the jurist, to thank him for his lifeline of availability and generosity in communicating with us,…
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A glimpse into adoption
On a whim, we left our kids with their grandparents and went overnight up in the mountains, to talk about our vision and plans to create an adoption community here in Cluj. [I sense a discomfort in our communities (leaders and otherwise) to even mention this loaded word. Adoption. Is it out of shame (for…
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La ziua porților deschise…
O sală plină cu parinti de viitori școlari, si o doamna învățătoare calma, calda, si deschisă. Ne-a spus mai multe lucruri despre următorii 5 ani de școala, dar ce mi-a ramas in minte a fost mesajul clar ca prioritatea ei in primul an, pe langa startul academic, sa fie modelarea caracterului copiilor in comunitate. Caracter!…
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Like the watchmen before dawn
It’s cold. We are exhausted. But I am filled with renewed hope. The icy waves crush into the shore. We squint to see a sign of light into the sea of darkness. The wind is howling. It’s deafening and mesmerizing all at once. I love a howling wind in a winter night. How long till…
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What was hard during the first adoption
⁃ traveling back and forth twice a day ⁃ 3-4 hours in the car with a carsick child ⁃ Taking her back to the foster family in the evening, and hear her cry after us to not leave her ⁃ Mandatory Medical appointments for the adoption file – she is afraid of hospitals. ⁃ Physical…
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Two years
Two years since we started exploring adoption again Preparing Jackie, Observing her disposition and openness. Again, Conrad was ready first. Decisive. I stood my ground in prayer: To keep my mind and heart open To be patient and strong To walk the bureaucratic steps To put my trust in God And to adapt to the…