How hard can it be? But also: how impactful?
Go the extra mile. The extra 10 miles in Cluj traffic towards Floresti. I was not planning to be out for so long. I jumped in the car to go get their luggage so they can go to the mall, but there was a mixup of host assignment and two friends mixed Cris-crossed the hosts.
I went shopping with/for Jackie while the kids ate at the food court, and people-watched and got to catch-up with a parents from Jackie’s class.
Somebody else’s mistake became my urgency. I would not drive to the mall at 5:30 pm. But here I was, praying for patience and perspective.
The time I spent with Jackie was sweet. On the way home I got a second wind of joy. Of energy. We were homebound. And the girls were suddenly chatty and were opening up. They were sweet, grateful, self-aware. “You are a lot of fun!” And I joked that I’m like a sister to which Jackie said “we don’t even share the same DNA.” She turned to the girls and said “You know, I’m adopted!” One of them responded with enthusiasm that she had been thinking that when she grows up she wants to adopt. Who knows what the future brings and how this interaction in the car will be retold to some grandkid.
I honestly believe that adoption has reshaped our understanding of hospitality, comfort and self-centeredness. And I draw from the memory of what means to be generous.
The guests had the usual awe to this neighborhood and view and the room we prepared for them. They stayed late, chatted, put facemarks on, and told us their life stories and listen to whatever we shared. They asked thoughtful questions and giggled and ivy was included in this mix of 4 chipper girls.
Waking up was difficult as they all stayed late. But I drove early and sent them on their way, for a day of interesting shadowing experiences at school and then a hike in Cheile Turzii. Jackie turned her phone off as the signal was poor and the battery drained faster than she expected. When I called one of the girls staying with us (didn’t have any other number from the bus) she looked for Jackie and said she is not on the bus.
My heart sunk. What does she mean she’s not on the bus?
Her phone showed her still in the Chei. I got the number of a profesor and as I called her answer by saying: “we’re on our way back”. Then I told him why I’m calling. The thought that crossed my mind was that he is on his way back to the Chei to get Jackie. It’s embarrassing how one call after another, people were making me more nervous as they had no answer. It turned out she was in the car with the director telling him all about her interesting life. He has a hard time remembering names but jaclyn is unforgettable and the fact that her dad is american and her accent is unusually cool. The tempo of her speech is captivating and she is fun and funny even when she isn’t trying to be.
I drove to school a third time that day to pick them up and we drove the offroad way by the cherry farm because the traffic coming back was at a standstill. Even at 7 pm on Friday.
Jackie was peopled out. Exhausted to the point of snapping at me for making calls when I couldn’t reach her. The night dragged on and I was definitely not as fun as the first night. I had entered the mom mode. I told her it is a gift to have someone worry for her.
But the girls explored the neighborhood again and said when I drove them back that the most interesting thing they saw on this trip (first time in Cluj) was this neighborhood.
In the morning after they had breakfast I drove them again to school for their last day of exploration in the city. And when we got back we found the sweetest letter from them. So thoughtful and filled with gratitude and sweet specific words of appreciation.