Category: Adoption
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The biggest battle
These last two years of waiting, waiting to meet my youngest daughter, I had to separate my mind from my heart. I know full well what my heart desires, but I also understand my adoptive parenting rights in our current legislative system, and the powerlessness while waiting. My biggest battle was against bitterness. It’s easy…
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Casa Elim
We picked J. up from school and hit the road to Braşov on the highway, cruising in delightful silence taking in the gorgeous January blue & funky sky. We spent the weekend in the mountains with new friends from all over the country and the world. We so needed a change of pace & to get…
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Scrambling up – in my dream
I’m near the top of the mountain. It’s rocky. The type of rocks I love, warm grey, with greenery in its crevasses. Jackie is ahead of me. I sustain her weight at times, pushing her up with my head. Conrad is nearby too. I hear his muffled encouragement. The wind is howling. We’re near the…
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Because of balance
…two heavy bags are easier than one, if you distribute the weight. We are starting the year with passion and focused energy. We’re laying the foundation for two different platforms, one has already been incorporated as an Association called polylogos.eu and has a clear vision, and resourceful people involved with drive and experience. The other…
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A loyal friend
It’s the middle of winter. The temperature doesn’t rise above freezing. It’s not pleasant to be outside for too long these days. The fog is thick and it dresses every surface in white. But last week we had a few sunny and beautiful days of vacation. We went sledding up the hill and we were…
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Dragoste în plasament
Săptămâna trecută am vizitat foștii asistenți maternali ai lui Jackie. Fără presiunea tranziției fiicei noastre sau a limitelor impuse de stat, prietenia noastră evoluează în mod natural. Conversațiile noastre sunt simple, dar cu adâncime în esență. Vizitându-i ajungem să întâlnim și să ne împrietenim cu ceilalți copii în plasament (care vin, se întăresc, se oblojesc,…
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Foster love
Last week we visited Jackie’s former foster parents. Without the pressure of our daughter’s transition or the state imposed boundaries, our friendship evolves naturally. Our conversations are simple but in between the lines we sense greatness and a silver lining. We get to meet and befriend other foster kids, and that in itself is a…
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Through her eyes
I went to check in on Jackie and cover her, as she tosses and turns. She had been sleeping for over two hours. Conrad and I always enjoy each other’s company after her bedtime, and shamelessly protect our evenings together without her verbose company. As I tuck her in, she sits up in bed and…
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Aspects of adoption
“Without the theological aspect, the emphasis on adoption too easily is seen as mere charity. Without the missional aspect, the doctrine of adoption is too easily seen as mere metaphor.” Russell Moore Adoption is spiritual war. When we lift our eyes from our selfish selves, and we move out of our immediate needs, we learn…
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Acknowledge, Align and Assure
A decade ago I was hired by Apple and I went to a week of training as part of my onboarding process. Everything I learned there was common sense, but in this particular professional context, it had application and structure. We did role-play, we practiced how to give and receive Feedback, and I learned about…
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Tomorrow is Evelyn’s birthday
Who is Evelyn? Your sister. She turns three. Can we go see her on her birthday? We can’t. I’m so sorry. I really-really want to see my sister tomorrow! I don’t understand why we can’t go see her. [Sobbing]. We sat like that for a while, she was crying by my side, head leaning on…
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I don’t tiptoe
When it comes to adoption and trauma, or difficult conversations, or potential pain… I don’t tiptoe. I don’t hold my breath. Because it would be exhausting and a disservice. Instead I own my full seat, and I keep my mouth shut while opening my eyes wide. I allow myself to feel. To understand. To remain…