Author: Violeta
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Impromptu interview
[audio src="https://violetaaltmann.com/wp-content/uploads/2022/03/interviu-adoptie-19-martie-31922-2.31-PM.m4a" /]
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Math
The “attitude of war” is becoming all too familiar. The emotional rollercoaster in our pre-pre teens has began a while ago. We would be in denial not to acknowledge it. The difference is stark between a 5 years old and a 8 years old. Something triggers her. Maybe she didn’t sleep enough, or too much.…
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Love your neighbor
It was brought to my attention that we have never had good relationships with out Ukrainian neighbors. Land was disputed. Nationalism was inherited from generation to generation. We rarely visited each other. My parents took a trip to Ukraine when I was my daughters age, and I got lost there, just for 30 minute, enough…
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processing a season of war
This intense season feels familiar. My mommy brain has been training for such a time as this. Have you ever filled balloons with air, the classic way? I was terrified that if I blew too much air the balloon will pop in my face. It has happened once or twice. But as I see and…
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Toxic stress
The reason kids from difficult places have special emotional needs that affect sometimes their ability to learn, is because early on their brain was flooded to stress hormones. And there was nobody to console them, to help them feel safe. To meet their needs, to offer warmth, and nourishment and rest. Many adoptive families believe…
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The difficult question of submission, not so difficult after all
We met at the age of 22. Our love and obedience to God was a decisive factor in our decision to marry. I had no illusions about my husband’s experience and abilities as a spiritual leader, to be the priest of our house. But I told him I loved God more than I loved him.…
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Subliminal noise
Maybe we would do a better job separating the anxious thoughts bombarding us, if we weren’t also involved in helping out directly. I thought my plate was full, and then I added one more course on top of it full. I fear I may mix up events, groups, or let things fall through the cracks.…
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Connected
The last few weeks, maybe months, I have felt disconnected. Though I function in society, I am connected to people, I serve, I enjoy life, I live, at a deeper level I have felt unsure, a bit cautious, and disconnected. What if I’m completely off tracks? I wrote a piece to break the ice, for…
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When it clicks
When I run out of solutions, I blatantly point my husband or my kids to God. “Ask Him!” I say. Pray about it. I don’t know anymore. It is not a secret that my biggest trigger is a disrespectful or ungrateful attitude. I wonder sometimes if my eyes trick me and I jump to conclusions.…
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Repair
They say it is better to make mistakes and repair than to be a perfect parent. So they say. A bone that breaks but heals well, it’s stronger than the bone that never broke. I assume it’s the other leg of the same person so we have generally the same bone density to begin with.…
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Connection
When we are at odds with out kids, we know what they need most is connection. When they whine, they misbehave, they push boundaries, if we as parents find a way to rise above the drama, feel mercy, feel empathy, show kindness, express honesty, then the connection is reestablished. For a few days we struggled.…