Month: February 2020
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First visit home
We have no control over things that happen to us in life. But we can control the way we respond to them. A couple of weeks ago someone rear-ended us during commute hour, before a busy roundabout. They made an honest mistake but they bent our trunk door and broke our bumper. We were on…
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Turning point
I was able to observe the evolution of my connection with Ivy, with a keen eye. I didn’t worry and I didn’t rush. I think I was just as cerebral with Jackie, but then I didn’t have a term of comparison. Also, nearly four years ago, we were told to enjoy this journey of coming…
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Dialogue and connection
Jackie, do you know how babies are made? God makes them (duh!) Yes, that’s true, but do you want to know the technical details? Yeeees? she leans in fully focused, wide eyed, intrigued. Evelyn is your biological sister because the same woman gave birth to you both. Wow! That’s so exciting! …Wait, you mean my…
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Evelyn
With reverence we enter into your world, sweet Evelyn. Perfect in every way. It feels as if I have known you forever. Inquisitive eyes, silliness and humor, you locked eyes with your daddy and were drawn to him with surprising warmth. You melted in his arms, resting your head on his chest. What a beautiful…
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The biggest battle
These last two years of waiting, waiting to meet my youngest daughter, I had to separate my mind from my heart. I know full well what my heart desires, but I also understand my adoptive parenting rights in our current legislative system, and the powerlessness while waiting. My biggest battle was against bitterness. It’s easy…
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Casa Elim
We picked J. up from school and hit the road to Braşov on the highway, cruising in delightful silence taking in the gorgeous January blue & funky sky. We spent the weekend in the mountains with new friends from all over the country and the world. We so needed a change of pace & to get…
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Scrambling up – in my dream
I’m near the top of the mountain. It’s rocky. The type of rocks I love, warm grey, with greenery in its crevasses. Jackie is ahead of me. I sustain her weight at times, pushing her up with my head. Conrad is nearby too. I hear his muffled encouragement. The wind is howling. We’re near the…
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At war with sin
My mom had a clear understanding of sin as I was growing up. I talk about her boundaries and intuitive parenting skills, but they all boil down to her ability to distinguish sin. In her own life first and foremost. Her ability to live by grace and in consequence extend it to us. But I…