Category: Spiritual
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The mistakes I make by taking over
Giving feedback is easier said than done. Being honest and kind and ferm in the moment is one of the hardest things one can do – and it’s impossible without practice, or prior decision. Like a steady walk on a beam. You don’t happen to be on a bean and walk elegantly. You are purposeful…
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Take my word for it
Let your yes be yes, and your no be no. My mom was a strong believer in clear honest talk. No matter the context. She disliked sarcasm as it hid frustration and double talk. And I do believe I owe it to my parents that the way I learned to interact with others had no…
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the real freedom of no
I had to disappoint a few people by refusing their request, challenging their expectations. I am tempted to offer more explanations. I catch myself. If I don’t sound overly justified I keep the explanations. If I come across as whiny, or needy, or insecure, I delete my pleading for understanding. Mostly because if I keep…
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Bitterness redeemed
I had to remember to be present, and postpone the wallowing in frustration. Oh, to be able to stop the train of negative thoughts, what a powerful feeling. Having tried this in a season of extreme exhaustion or emotional overstimulation, the feeling of powerlessness added to the frustration. Enough with the theory. Every week I…
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Romance
Both girls giggle about boys. So innocent. Different boys come to the door ti invite them out to play. They gag when they see kissing in movies, but the interest in boys is in a stage of its own in their development. They try to play it cool but then they ask me stuff. And…
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Last minute stars alignment
Having friends, maintaining friendships can be expensive. Having built these friendships through church we got used to free socializing. But I can see how going out is getting to be too pricy. Alas, we went on a weekend away and swam and assembled food, shared stories and listened to each other’s heart or silliness. And…
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Self confidence
How easy it is for the self-importance car to take a wrong turn. Here we are, driving the proper way, switching only occasionally to course correct. But mostly going in the right direction. Even when I worried, I sensed God’s delight in our obedience despite the imediate results. These days of over confidence boost, riding…
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you pray
This is how Ivy calls me to their room after we already said good night, and Conrad and I read quietly on the couch. It’s usually to talk through something and to pray. I usually have to dig a little deeper to find the real question. Ivy deflects.⁃ what do you mean?She repeats the question.…
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MVT – întâlnire de vară
Mă întreb uneori daca e bine sa apar așa epuizată la întâlniri de lucru. Dar realizez cu îngrijorare ca asta a devenit modul standard de operare de câțiva nai. Unele zile sunt mai eficiente ca altele dar nu sunt predictibile. Totuși daca as aștepta sa fiu bine odihnita nu as mai merge sau nu as…
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Civil disobedience
I have been a very obedient child. Having an older brother who stepped on a few mines of exploring his free will, I have learned to navigate the social system to my advantage. I could have been an expert manipulator. I worried at times that I’m too good and nimble in social settings to be…
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Failing
There must be a balance between taking care of family with warmth and presence and commitment, and the ability to empower them to grow mature and responsible. I was never pushed outside of my comfort zone too early. Some natural things in my family, like spending time at my grandmother as the eldest cousin, observing…