Category: Memories
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Forgetfulness
Out of fearful brain, I easily forget to do this or that. I interrupt my own train of thought to do something that crosses my mind. I got to accomplish lots this way. I was so efficient. But my short term memory, treaded with fear, it started to fail me. Seriously fail me. I would…
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To honor my instinct
Listen well. Take action. Respect my intuition. So it will continue to speak clearly So I could hear itSo it can steer me clear of dangerous paths This is the hardest. To believe that what I want is important. This is an ache I carry from the time I was my kids’ current age. Though I was most…
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Perspective
Pe site-ul copii.gov.ro sunt povești emoționate și reale și încurajatoare despre adopție. Majoritatea scrise în primii ani, poveștile încă proaspete, și în mod evident romantice. Dar după o vreme, chiar cu cele mai bune intenții, subiectul adopției se prăfuiește. Obosim de atâta atenție, de povara de a fi diferit, și vrem să ne ascundem, să…
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Comparison
I always believed that my self-sufficiency was rooted in my introversion. I didn’t need others to feel at ease, whole, happy. It may have had something to do with my dedication to God, no matter what, when I was 12. I had become aware of my complete and utter need for Him, based on everything…
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Ioana
I regard you with envy and admiration.A decision that was fraught over.Not easy. But necessary.Closing a chapter. Making a clean cut.I appreciate your declared availabilityBut it’s not necessary.I worry for that phrase. The open door.Hopefully we won’t abuse it.Maybe you’ve tested the waters of absence,letting us go. Slowly over time.We’ll make do.I want to bless…
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Words have power
I remembered, I felt how powerful a positive word spoken clearly in my mind can be.When have I stopped doing that? Why? I have lived in a fog. Dense. Sticky with sadness, tiredness. Then after clearing the film of silence off the topI could breath againAnd hearI listened to barely whispered questionsAnd received an answer.Not…
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The fog has lifted
My own emotionsOut of my control.The emotions are not to be fabricatedBut observed,Processed and embraced.I want to feel brave and kind and generousI want to serve with endless energy But I am a limited human.And that is ok. After a few weeks of unhealthy airThere was a fog of pollutionAnd heavy still airFinally the wind…
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Change of routine
I’ve been too exhausted to plan a rest period. I didn’t know whom to turn to for respite. Home life demands my active involvement in every area. Occasionally I take a step back, but I hold my breath knowing it is only temporary. I keep going. Like a soldier. Tired to the bone but not…
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Silent
I have danced an exhausting routine of wordsWisdom impartedCorrection and gentle nudgingWe have prayed and I have preachedI always had an answer and an explanationReading between the lines to what the question actually wasAnd kept one step aheadAnticipating needs knowing intuitively what they needAs I knew what they already knew themselves. Until one Sunday disagreement…
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zădărnicie
Un alt concept preluat din cartea: ține-ți copiii aproape. Când te confrunți cu o limită, cu o blocadă, cu o descurajare. Când trebuie să te oprești, să deschizi mâinile și mintea, și să încerci o altă abordare. Frustrarea, mania, definiția nebuniei care încearcă iar și iar aceeași cale fără rezultate. Toate se realizează, de dezumfla.…
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what’s in a sibling
I grew up with an older brother. When we were little we played a lot. His mere existence offered me a sense of security and connectedness. He also helped me with math and physics in 6th grade. He was always kind to me, and on a few occasions shockingly direct for my pre teen sensibilities…
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ivy is 8
She is the baby in the house. We try to elevate her, give her responsibilities which she fulfills with timely commitment and joy. But then she retreats in her baby stage, soft voice, cute demeanor. Not my favorite but I love her nonetheless. When we visit friends, babies are drawn to her like bees to…