Oh my goodness. For a few months I got a little worried. My eldest daughter would so easily get on my nerves. We would butt heads, and we would disagree too often for my comfort. And every day was the same. We would find something to cause disagreement. The feeling of helplessness or feeling trapped in a vicious cycle, even as a well rounded adult, who has dealt with bigger and more difficult interactions. I’m willing to learn to embrace humility to admit fault. But it all seemed futile. Enraging. Difficult. And the scariest part? She is only 7. What the heck are we going to do in the next 10 years? Implode? Connect before correct, smart care, self care, lower standards… I was at a low point with my faith and energy.
Just a few months later though, I look at my daughter and see how wonderfully she was made, with her sass and confidence and stubbornness. She is beautiful inside and out snd i wouldn’t change who she is. I actually enjoy her company and she makes me laugh like nobody else except her daddy. I have squinted my eyes to see her clearer, with kindness and grace. I have let go of my fears and stubborn living in the future and became more present. Jackie is her own person, wonderfully made. God’s daughter. My gift.