I spent the morning with the girls getting blood drawn and seeing a variety of doctors for a routine checkup. Meanwhile Conrad was checking on some recent discomfort. Nine years ago, in 2012 we were entering a whirlwind of emotions when conrad was diagnosed with cancer and rushed into surgery. One testicle was removed. In the slight chance that we could still conceive we kept the healthy one. Studies say that the chances to have testicular cancer again is 5 to 8 times higher for someone who had it. Though after 5 years of chance for the same cancer to reoccur decreases drastically.

anyhow, here we go again.

tomorrow I’m getting a X-ray for Jackie’s scoliosis while conrad is doing a CT scan on two worrisome tumors on the remaining testicle.

I’m cool and collected. My mind is clear and I focus on what needs to be done. “What if” has no room in our dialogue. Conrad is gathering his wits and thoughts. He is emotional and I am not. I’m actually too stoic.

The girls were too excited about their bravery at doctors today. So no they talked animated and jolly. Meanwhile conrad and I continue to process silently heavier burdens than little shoulders need to or can carry at this time.

Most likely a surgery is imminent. We hope for benign and contained tumors.

navigating the Romanian health system is Conrad’s slight concern. We have health insurance but with big surgeries many people are on their own. And the costs can vary drastically.

We take every day as it comes.

This weekend we drive to a wedding. On Monday school starts. Next week jackie has a music exam to start music school if scoliosis permits it. Yet another heartbreak to not be able to play the violin because the scoliosis has not gotten any better in a year.