In good company

Introverts don’t try too hard to be part of many groups. But they follow through with what they committed to do. They get stuff done but have to rely on others to see the introverts who don’t advertise their skills. In the work place we learn to document what we do, market our skills without becoming someone else, comunicate better, speak up when we need to advocate for a project or an idea.

I have learned a great deal in my journey as an adult. We all build a foundation of knowledge up the point of entering the work force, and sometimes we find the best company or context to grow through.

Last weekend I spent it with a group of women, diverse in our upbringing and training, but who have motherhood in common and a clear desire to work together in this particular organization called MomCo.

Because I’m not naturally gifted in social setting, I try to practice reaching out and inviting families or students on Friday nights for a meal together. To bless them and we are in turn blessed with amazing conversations and making new friends. My husband and I are both introverts, me less than him, but still on the quiet side, but together we’ve managed to open our home on a regular basis.

This has been great but draining. New people ar amazing but we reached a point where we needed familiarity and steady friends. As we serve others we even forget the need to lay to rest our own heart and mind.

The last two years I spread myself thin. And it was rewarding and energizing but I slowly slipped into emotional and spiritual exhaustion. That was not good. Shutting everything or everyone out was not a solution and finding a balance was tricky. Oh, the gift of measure, steady balancing the yes and the no. Discerning. I reached rock bottom among my MomCo community but I didn’t quite know how to verbalize it. And I was ashamed of my exhaustion and irritation. I took a sabbatical of a couple of month from translating, I drew my breath, and I was pleasantly surprised that there was still room for me upon my return. There were no excesive curiosity or need for explanations.

I had to pull away from some projects and social engagements. I would attend out of duty and trying to clearly see where my heart was took some soul searching. Responsibility is my gift and my pitfall.

I started to give more time to MomCo, because I felt encouraged by certain co-leaders. I was then invited to be part of the official MVT team and I agreed. I still didn’t quite know how much of myself I need to give, but it was practically the stuff I had already been doing while being part of an amazing team.

The small group feels more like home. I feel clearer in my role and direction. And as I continuously know better the women I feel inspired. We have solid backgrounds in all areas of life, brilliant in every way and humble in a motherly serving with joy kind of way.

I think all the leaders I work with still have a hard time raising their hand saying “I’m good at this. I’ll do it” but the reality is that even if we don’t know, we will figure it out. There are things we are good at and things we don’t feel comfortable in, but we learn to comunicate better the maybe, yes and hard no.

I had the best time laughing to tears this weekend. The stories and delivery, the interruptions and the completing each others’ sentences, the grace and love and admiration shared.

All this, while the initiator of this weekend away, served us with such grace. She arrived early and prepared the food. She facilitated the productive conversation to stay on track and we covered a lot of ground, of planning for the future after reflecting on the past.

The comfort and ease among these women was delightful and inspiring!