We can’t control what people do. We can only control how we respond.
It’s not what you think. In my quest to cut things off my endless list, my projects list, my to list, as I succeed pulling away from some things, many flood to take their place.
Monday was busy. Busy at the pool. Busy on the road. I got many calls to help with different small projects, to offer advice. On my to do list was recording a short video about the book and spend some quality time with my husband. I coordinated then the drop off at the music school and Tata offered to pick j up at 5. I tried to ship a few books, one address would not go through. 7 times I booked the delivery and it would not go.
My mind was racing by the end of the day. Jackie tried to do homework in the evening. She managed well given the long day. We were all so hungry at dinner.
To top the day off, we got invited to a couples weekend away, as well as a 7 week class, and a Wednesday dinner. We have plans that weekend, and Wednesday we celebrate Jackie’s birthday at home.
After we got to bed, the director of ARFO saw my video talking about the book and invited me to speak at any of their four events in November. To share my thoughts, or the lessons i learned over time. They are in line with the theme of the events this year. Or could be.
So you see, I can’t control where people invite me, but I have full control over the way I respond. And people feel comfortable asking because they trust I’ll make a confident decision, not a guilt ridden one.
One year I decided to say yes to all invitations. This year I have to learn to say no off the bat. Not “let me talk to my family”, nor “let me think about it.” Simply “no”. It’s a full year and I’m scaling down my busy life. Hopefully next year life won’t be so overwhelming. But I’m not holding my breath. Still learning this lesson of embracing my present, and saying no with grace.