Both girls giggle about boys. So innocent. Different boys come to the door ti invite them out to play. They gag when they see kissing in movies, but the interest in boys is in a stage of its own in their development. They try to play it cool but then they ask me stuff. And I engage.
Last night they called me to pray with them. It has become code for talk a bit more, clarify. Listen answer questions. It’s a marathon.
They wanted to know if a nice boy came to the door and asked them on a date when they are 15, would I let them go out with him? As we set boundaries, and communicate clearly, as well as understand our own values & theirs, I don’t see a problem with it.
But we did also pray. And in my prayer I got to lay out my heart on the matter. Sometimes in way I don’t even anticipate. I can’t lie in prayers.
So I invited God to fill their heart, cover it inside out with love, with courage and good will. May they prepare their heart loving God fully and wholeheartedly and let themselves be fully know and loved by him, so that one a boy pursues their heart, it would filter all the fear, the shame, the manipulation. They won’t fall prey to any fake sense of love and belonging because they already belong and are fully seen and delighted in.
I spoke the truth about my understanding of love and romance, and I shared openly about how I have lived a more fulfilled, hopeful and restful life in Jesus, before giving my heart to my husband.
Humans have limited understanding and ability to fulfill anyone’s needs. I have failed and they will fail to be perfect. But there is a perfect God we can rely on to keep us sane, alive, safe.
We use our discernment to run way from danger, to stay away from people who want to harm us, but there is also hope in finding and surrounding ourselves with people who inspire us to look beyond, who effortlessly make us better people and we do the same for them. Let’s keep our eyes open to recognize such friends.
My daughters are nearly 9 and 12. They have matured so much this summer. Incredible leaps! And I don’t think the maturing will slow down but will continue to be evident in exponential measure.
May I have the wisdom and availability and joy to share such a beautiful chapter with them. I love it so far!