After a handful of draining experiences of public speaking, I lost my interest.
I had stood up in front of an apathetic audience on one side, and judgmental on the other. On top of it, 90% of the chairs were empty, and as I learned later on, speaking to any large or small audience, if there are empty chairs in the room, these chairs will suck the energy out of you. So put them away. Also, never get up and speak about what you don’t believe in. Be true. Be honest. To yourself to your audience.
Today was a turning point. I had prepared for it, built up to it and I had gotten inspired in Croatia by speakers, topics and unmistakeable passion and belief.
Today I facilitated a two hour training to an engaged audience, on a topic dear to me, based on my many years of teaching and conducting group and employee training. The one thing I regret is not facilitating in English. But no less, my knowledge, experience and enthusiasm transpired. I have two more training engagements at their two other offices, and I will do the next one in English. Oh, how can I feel so comfortable and at home when speaking this foreign language. Yet I do. Wholeheartedly.
To answer the question of a speaker in croatia: “if you could do anything you wanted, and money was of no consequence, and you know you couldn’t fail, what would you do?” Public speaking. I would train people and inspire people. And I have now begun in earnest. Other than the training I did as part of my job, or the public speaking at camps, then translator at camps, this is my first properly paid public speaking engagement. I have to chuckle when people ask me if I will ever get a job. I am now doing what I love and I make money out of it.
I am building my portfolio of expertise and favorite training topics, maybe even get a (paid) intern or two, and so do what I always knew I wanted to do in life. It’s rather incredible that It is finally happening.