We visited the child protection office. A huge building with imposing architecture, with huge heavy doors and old hallways. My stomach in a knot, and no one in sight. We finally knocked and opened a side door. I told the lady that we are interested in talking to someone about adoption. The surprised look on people’s faces varies between hopeful and incredulous.
We ended up knocking at 7 doors, in two different buildings and it seemed that nobody wanted to talk to us. We were sent from door to door to different social workers. But the ladies we sat down finally were nice but speed talked. Conrad was wide-eyed trying to catch as much as possible from the conversation and caught 20%. I asked a few questions but the answers weren’t very encouraging. Before getting the accrediting document stating that were are eligible adoptive parents, by law we have to live in romania for a year. So we couldn’t do that yet. Also, Conrad would just give his consent as spouse for me to adopt, so he would have a supportive role in the process, but I would be the main actor.
On the other hand, we could apply as international couple, fill out the initial paper in the states and be in touch with the Bucuresti office, but this process can take up to 3-4 years.
Bureaucracy is at its best. Though apparently there are 2000 Romanian families waiting to adopt, there are hundreds of abandoned children waiting to be adopted, so somewhere, somehow the system is flawed. It seems meant to discourage people from adopting, though the intention is, I hope and believe, meant to protect the children, sometimes protect them so well that they remain in the system.
I cried on my way out. It may have been due to the built up emotions, the discouraging news, the long journey ahead, the many doors we had to knock at today, and the many doors we may have to persistently knock, listen, wait or bust open.
Conrad’s presence and composure are so comforting. His hugs and deep gentle voice are like warm milk and honey. I’m not sure I would want to go through this without him.
There are a few things coming up on this topic, some meetings and visits. We’ll see what comes of them.